I was contemplating what to write about when an event I read about a couple of years ago popped into my head. The event was being held in New York and it was called “Fashion meets Finance” the event was meant to hook up single guys in the finance world with single women in the fashion world. But in only the way New York can pull off straight up superficial attitude mixed with elitism, all the while making it seem classy, there was of course a catch to the event. No one was able to just purchase a ticket to attend the event, quite the opposite in fact, you had to be invited. Men and women who wanted to attend were asked to submit their picture, name, occupation and salary range. Easy right? No harm in applying to see if you get an invite right? Wrong. Every person who applied had their picture and info (including salary range) posted on the event’s website and whether or not they had been invited or declined. God bless New York. (I actually spent a good amount of time going though the applicants info and learned 2 things – Fashion really doesn’t pay all that well, and men that work in Finance in NY are ridiculously good looking.)
With my goal one day to work for a Fashion Magazine in New York, I can really see the appeal of dating a man that works in Finance. First off, I love fashion. Some people look at a painting and instantly make a connection with it. They see the beauty in the brush strokes, in the use of colours. Well I’m that way with dresses, and blazers, and skirts and heels and boots and accessories and fur... oh my god, do I love fur. But see the difference between someone that loves paintings and someone that loves fashion is that around every corner there isn’t an art gallery to tempt you and don’t even get me started on sample sale websites (they are a gift and a curse at the same time). When I see a beautiful designer dress I feel a pang inside, I need it and it needs a good home, I have to buy it. This is where dating a man that works in finance comes in because they know how to budget! They would be able to look at exactly how much I can spend on shopping while still having enough money to go out and show off my shopping achievements. A man in finance would most probably also be saving his money to put a down payment on a summer house etc. which in turn makes him even more appealing. Men in Finance also seem to make a hell of a lot more than women in Fashion, so just think of the benefits of a joint bank account when you get married!
So yes, the two worlds of Fashion and Finance seem to fit perfectly together, and would even create a new shopping opportunity of men’s suits, cuff links, polo shirts and argyle sweaters to buy as gifts for your man. The people who ran that event in New York knew what they were doing, just another reason it’s one of the greatest cities in the world.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
What did people do before internet stalking?...
My name is Becca, and I’m a facebook addict... and I know I’m not the only one. As addictive as facebook is, it does come in very useful when you’re starting to date someone you don’t know. A person’s profile page is usually a pretty good indicator of what that person is really like. For example, when I started dating a very nice guy last year and looked up his page, I couldn’t help but notice all of his pictures were of him and various trash-tastic girls. Most of the girls I recognized, not because I knew them, but because I knew of them and their infamous stories. So 1 – he’s probably a lot like the girls he hangs out with, and 2 – he does a very poor job of masking the fact that he has an affinity for girls with fake tans and fake chests.
When used correctly, facebook is amazing. But when you’re single, the people you add as friends and the pictures you choose to be tagged in can make you or break you. As a general rule, I don’t add guys I’m dating as friends, if they find me, I’ll usually put them on limited profile. This is because for status updates I write whatever pops into my head, such as “I’ll know I’ve grown up when I wake up and smell like wine instead of tequila” and “Even if I got a yellow car and painted it red, I would still know it was originally yellow. It’s like dating a post-op transsexual.” - That is a level of crazy reserved for my friends, someone I’ve just started dating may not understand my particular sense of humour.
However, sometimes it’s useful if a guy can see my status update. I was dating a guy last summer and he added me to facebook. He wasn’t putting as much effort into wooing me as he should have been so I made my status “Becca had the most beautiful flowers delivered to her office today!!” then I told a few friends to comment, so they wrote “he is so sweet!” and “he’s definitely a keeper!”. Now obviously there were no flowers, but as soon as this guy thought I was dating someone else that’s sending me flowers, he stepped his game up tenfold. Manipulation? Possibly... but rather than telling him he needed to try harder, I let him think he was figuring it out on his own. It’s a win/win!
This blog topic came up because I spent a good amount of time looking up “Fire Engine Red” guy (who btw phoned me while on vacation to tell me he was thinking of me... usually I would think that’s a little intense, but he’s really good looking, so I’m going to let it slide) anyway, I found him, but his privacy settings wouldn’t let me see the interesting things like pictures. All in good time, I’m sure. He’s still gone another 2 weeks, which actually works out perfectly, because in 2 weeks “Summer Fun Pink” guy is moving away for a few months. It’s like the God of Fashion and Shoes is rewarding me for all my hard shopping with amazing scheduling. And I love him for it!
**This post is dedicated to my wonderful Fashion and English language loving friend who left me to go kickass in Bono’s hometown. Safe to say she was like a pseudo-therapist for me when it came to all issues, but especially concerning guys. Thank god for Skype!**
When used correctly, facebook is amazing. But when you’re single, the people you add as friends and the pictures you choose to be tagged in can make you or break you. As a general rule, I don’t add guys I’m dating as friends, if they find me, I’ll usually put them on limited profile. This is because for status updates I write whatever pops into my head, such as “I’ll know I’ve grown up when I wake up and smell like wine instead of tequila” and “Even if I got a yellow car and painted it red, I would still know it was originally yellow. It’s like dating a post-op transsexual.” - That is a level of crazy reserved for my friends, someone I’ve just started dating may not understand my particular sense of humour.
However, sometimes it’s useful if a guy can see my status update. I was dating a guy last summer and he added me to facebook. He wasn’t putting as much effort into wooing me as he should have been so I made my status “Becca had the most beautiful flowers delivered to her office today!!” then I told a few friends to comment, so they wrote “he is so sweet!” and “he’s definitely a keeper!”. Now obviously there were no flowers, but as soon as this guy thought I was dating someone else that’s sending me flowers, he stepped his game up tenfold. Manipulation? Possibly... but rather than telling him he needed to try harder, I let him think he was figuring it out on his own. It’s a win/win!
This blog topic came up because I spent a good amount of time looking up “Fire Engine Red” guy (who btw phoned me while on vacation to tell me he was thinking of me... usually I would think that’s a little intense, but he’s really good looking, so I’m going to let it slide) anyway, I found him, but his privacy settings wouldn’t let me see the interesting things like pictures. All in good time, I’m sure. He’s still gone another 2 weeks, which actually works out perfectly, because in 2 weeks “Summer Fun Pink” guy is moving away for a few months. It’s like the God of Fashion and Shoes is rewarding me for all my hard shopping with amazing scheduling. And I love him for it!
**This post is dedicated to my wonderful Fashion and English language loving friend who left me to go kickass in Bono’s hometown. Safe to say she was like a pseudo-therapist for me when it came to all issues, but especially concerning guys. Thank god for Skype!**
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
I'm just not a "neutral beige" type of girl...
Ok, so here’s the deal – it takes me about 10 minutes to decide what colour I’m going to paint my nails. Nail polish lasts for a week, and sometimes after I put it on, I change my mind, take it off and start again. So, when the universe suddenly gives me a plethora of guys, it’s very hard for me to know who to choose. There are 3 main guys, and in nail polish terms – I have a “fire engine red”, “neutral beige” and a “summer fun pink”.
So far the “fire engine red” is my favourite. The way we met is actually really funny – I was out with a friend and I saw a guy who used to play on Nick’s soccer team. I haven’t seen any of those guys in over a year, but he was staring at me pretty intently. He ended up walking over to talk to me and was with a drop dead gorgeous man. He said he wanted to introduce me to his friend because we’re both Macedonian (look up Macedonia on a map, it really does exist). Turns out, not only does this gorgeous man have the same heritage as me, he also grew up 10 minutes away from where I did. We ended up talking for 3 hours that night and called me the next day. I saw him again this past weekend and his sad news for me was that he was going away for 3 weeks. I’m looking at this as a positive, because this way I can enjoy the rest of my summer, and he’ll come back right when things start to quiet down for fall.
My “summer fun pink” guy is just that. He’s a summer boy. He’s the type of guy you chill with in the summer, and it’s always really fun, but that’s all he’s going to be. I went out for lunch with him and a girlfriend of mine the other day. We started talking about dating, and usually I censor myself, but for some reason I wanted to mess with his mind a bit. Bless his heart, by the end of lunch the look on his face looked like I verbally bitch slapped him.
Now, “neutral beige” – oh god, where do I start. He’s very sweet, actually far too sweet. He is looking for a girlfriend, and I told him not to date me, I gave him fair warning but he must like pain. It started because he has a boat, and I really liked the idea of me on a boat in the summer. The boat date was fine, a little long, and at a point when we were going back to the marina I remember thinking “I bet I could swim faster”, but it was ok.
During the date I told him for some reason this summer I’ve been craving hotdogs, and purposely going places just because I know that there will be hotdogs at the event (I wish I was kidding). Anyway a few days later, he asks me if I want to go play mini-put and grab a hotdog. Obviously I said yes, so the next day he picks me up at noon to go play.
While we’re driving there he brings up some play that he’s heard is really good, and asks me if I would want to go see it. I say yes, thinking I’ll get out of it later when he brings it up again. But to my surprise he drives right to the theatre, goes in and buys tickets for 8pm that night (I actually had other plans, but at this point had no idea what to say). So we play mini-put and he thinks it’s cute to give me a lower score than what I actually put. I would put 6 and he would say “we’ll give you a 3 for that one; oh look we’re tied now”. Honestly I don’t need my ego stroked in mini-put; I’m alright with being awful. He did this at every hole and by the 10th hole I was about to hit him over the head with the club. I refrained though because I didn’t think I could hit him hard enough to knock him out.
So after that he ordered my hotdog for me, except he got me a genetically mutated one that had cheese inside of it. As I sat there trying to eat, I suddenly realized he probably wanted to hang out all day. I asked him what his plan was. He said he wanted to take me to the butterfly gardens. It’s like he was trying to piss me off. I told him I had only planned for mini-put and had other things to do and asked him to take me home. So he drops me off at 2 and tells me he’ll be back at 5:30 to pick me up for dinner and the play (oh good).
So 5:30 rolls around and he’s early to pick me up, so he had to wait 20 minutes while I got ready. We go to a tapa restaurant and decided to sit at the bar. He orders a beer and I order vodka. He kept ordering food that I said I didn’t eat, so 4 vodka martinis and an empty stomach later I was ready to go to the play (I was most definitely drunk). I made it to intermission then told him I was sick and he needed to take me home. On the way home he started talking about some double date that we should do with friends, I didn't even acknowledge the comment. I should have felt bad, but I really didn’t. When I got home I ended up hanging out with my friend all night, and we had a blast. Then the next day he texted me saying he hoped I felt better, then the day after that he asked if I wanted to go on the boat, I told him I was still sick, so he asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I didn’t answer.
I’m not sure how I have the ability to act terribly (I actually told this story to someone and they called me a nightmare) but the guys just keep coming back for more. I do feel bad about this one though, he is very sweet, and clearly just wants a girlfriend. The problem is I don’t like being the bad one in a relationship, I mean I usually am anyway, but it’s usually less obvious.
So far the “fire engine red” is my favourite. The way we met is actually really funny – I was out with a friend and I saw a guy who used to play on Nick’s soccer team. I haven’t seen any of those guys in over a year, but he was staring at me pretty intently. He ended up walking over to talk to me and was with a drop dead gorgeous man. He said he wanted to introduce me to his friend because we’re both Macedonian (look up Macedonia on a map, it really does exist). Turns out, not only does this gorgeous man have the same heritage as me, he also grew up 10 minutes away from where I did. We ended up talking for 3 hours that night and called me the next day. I saw him again this past weekend and his sad news for me was that he was going away for 3 weeks. I’m looking at this as a positive, because this way I can enjoy the rest of my summer, and he’ll come back right when things start to quiet down for fall.
My “summer fun pink” guy is just that. He’s a summer boy. He’s the type of guy you chill with in the summer, and it’s always really fun, but that’s all he’s going to be. I went out for lunch with him and a girlfriend of mine the other day. We started talking about dating, and usually I censor myself, but for some reason I wanted to mess with his mind a bit. Bless his heart, by the end of lunch the look on his face looked like I verbally bitch slapped him.
Now, “neutral beige” – oh god, where do I start. He’s very sweet, actually far too sweet. He is looking for a girlfriend, and I told him not to date me, I gave him fair warning but he must like pain. It started because he has a boat, and I really liked the idea of me on a boat in the summer. The boat date was fine, a little long, and at a point when we were going back to the marina I remember thinking “I bet I could swim faster”, but it was ok.
During the date I told him for some reason this summer I’ve been craving hotdogs, and purposely going places just because I know that there will be hotdogs at the event (I wish I was kidding). Anyway a few days later, he asks me if I want to go play mini-put and grab a hotdog. Obviously I said yes, so the next day he picks me up at noon to go play.
While we’re driving there he brings up some play that he’s heard is really good, and asks me if I would want to go see it. I say yes, thinking I’ll get out of it later when he brings it up again. But to my surprise he drives right to the theatre, goes in and buys tickets for 8pm that night (I actually had other plans, but at this point had no idea what to say). So we play mini-put and he thinks it’s cute to give me a lower score than what I actually put. I would put 6 and he would say “we’ll give you a 3 for that one; oh look we’re tied now”. Honestly I don’t need my ego stroked in mini-put; I’m alright with being awful. He did this at every hole and by the 10th hole I was about to hit him over the head with the club. I refrained though because I didn’t think I could hit him hard enough to knock him out.
So after that he ordered my hotdog for me, except he got me a genetically mutated one that had cheese inside of it. As I sat there trying to eat, I suddenly realized he probably wanted to hang out all day. I asked him what his plan was. He said he wanted to take me to the butterfly gardens. It’s like he was trying to piss me off. I told him I had only planned for mini-put and had other things to do and asked him to take me home. So he drops me off at 2 and tells me he’ll be back at 5:30 to pick me up for dinner and the play (oh good).
So 5:30 rolls around and he’s early to pick me up, so he had to wait 20 minutes while I got ready. We go to a tapa restaurant and decided to sit at the bar. He orders a beer and I order vodka. He kept ordering food that I said I didn’t eat, so 4 vodka martinis and an empty stomach later I was ready to go to the play (I was most definitely drunk). I made it to intermission then told him I was sick and he needed to take me home. On the way home he started talking about some double date that we should do with friends, I didn't even acknowledge the comment. I should have felt bad, but I really didn’t. When I got home I ended up hanging out with my friend all night, and we had a blast. Then the next day he texted me saying he hoped I felt better, then the day after that he asked if I wanted to go on the boat, I told him I was still sick, so he asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I didn’t answer.
I’m not sure how I have the ability to act terribly (I actually told this story to someone and they called me a nightmare) but the guys just keep coming back for more. I do feel bad about this one though, he is very sweet, and clearly just wants a girlfriend. The problem is I don’t like being the bad one in a relationship, I mean I usually am anyway, but it’s usually less obvious.
Friday, August 6, 2010
It's raining men...
So much to tell all of you, so many guys, and they're all so different.
I'm in the middle of 2 dates right now, but I'll write a full report tonight!
There's something about this summer air!
I'm in the middle of 2 dates right now, but I'll write a full report tonight!
There's something about this summer air!
Monday, August 2, 2010
Burn baby, burn...
Have you ever had a bombshell dropped on you, and your mouth just literally fell open? I had one of those moments last week. I followed it with a long session from my therapist Jose Cuervo, because I needed to allow myself one night for a pity party, and then get over it. Mr. Cuervo made me feel a lot better.
So you’re probably wondering what happened... yes well, it involves Jake as many of my previous posts have, and my friend Marianna.
Marianna and I met about 2½ years ago, but we were really more acquaintances than friends. We started hanging out a lot recently and obviously I talked about the boy drama that I was going through. Then we started talking about past men that we dated. And then we discovered that we both dated Jake – at the same time. Now this wasn’t shocking to me, I knew Jake would date many girls, just like I would be dating other guys. So Marianna and I started swapping stories (if you ever need to get over an Ex, find someone else he dated, I guarantee you it will set you straight). There were some differences between our stories, but not many. And then Marianna said it “do you ever feel like he was the one that got away?” and I replied “yep, until we started talking, now I don’t.” (for the record I ended it with Jake... over a text message...)
Marianna said she only dated him for a few months, but they stayed friends. I told her that I tried to end it with him because it had been 2 years and we weren’t going anywhere. That’s when Jake told me he wanted our relationship to go somewhere. I realized I’d waited 2 years to hear him say that and when he finally said it, it just wasn’t enough.
Marianna said she couldn’t believe it because Jake saying that was huge.
Then she said “ yeah, I mean he was pretty screwed up about relationships after the divorce from his wife.” BAM - it was like I got hit by a sledge hammer. (the only thing more shocking than finding out your Ex is getting married is finding out your Ex was married and you had no idea)
I couldn’t shut my mouth, it just fell open. Marianna realized I didn’t know, and told me it was just some girl from Ontario. That didn’t matter, 2 years and he couldn’t have mentioned he was married; it’s kind of something that should come up.
That’s when I realized he had strung me along for 2 years, and I was stupid enough to let him do it. The only consolation I have is that it ended a year and a half ago and I was the one that walked away. But learning this new information changed my opinion about him – I no longer look at him as someone that I could possibly get back together with in the future, or even want to be friends with for that matter. If he was a hypothetical dress I had hanging in the back of my closet, I’ve taken it out and set it on fire. Also, this meant that I could now go into sordid detail about all the weird things he did that I’ve been keeping secret... and I did... to all my friends... and it felt great.
I saw the signs the whole time; I just chose to ignore them. If we’re going to go into details about the signs, well he... (this has been removed because my mother assured me I would be sued. Personally I think a lawsuit would be great publicity for the blog, but nevertheless, she worries about me enough)... sounds like a character from a movie right?
But really this is my life, the people I know are never normal. That’s why I write this blog, I just seem to meet the most extraordinarily eccentric people and their stories need to be told... more as a warning than anything else... but still I wouldn’t trade it.
So you’re probably wondering what happened... yes well, it involves Jake as many of my previous posts have, and my friend Marianna.
Marianna and I met about 2½ years ago, but we were really more acquaintances than friends. We started hanging out a lot recently and obviously I talked about the boy drama that I was going through. Then we started talking about past men that we dated. And then we discovered that we both dated Jake – at the same time. Now this wasn’t shocking to me, I knew Jake would date many girls, just like I would be dating other guys. So Marianna and I started swapping stories (if you ever need to get over an Ex, find someone else he dated, I guarantee you it will set you straight). There were some differences between our stories, but not many. And then Marianna said it “do you ever feel like he was the one that got away?” and I replied “yep, until we started talking, now I don’t.” (for the record I ended it with Jake... over a text message...)
Marianna said she only dated him for a few months, but they stayed friends. I told her that I tried to end it with him because it had been 2 years and we weren’t going anywhere. That’s when Jake told me he wanted our relationship to go somewhere. I realized I’d waited 2 years to hear him say that and when he finally said it, it just wasn’t enough.
Marianna said she couldn’t believe it because Jake saying that was huge.
Then she said “ yeah, I mean he was pretty screwed up about relationships after the divorce from his wife.” BAM - it was like I got hit by a sledge hammer. (the only thing more shocking than finding out your Ex is getting married is finding out your Ex was married and you had no idea)
I couldn’t shut my mouth, it just fell open. Marianna realized I didn’t know, and told me it was just some girl from Ontario. That didn’t matter, 2 years and he couldn’t have mentioned he was married; it’s kind of something that should come up.
That’s when I realized he had strung me along for 2 years, and I was stupid enough to let him do it. The only consolation I have is that it ended a year and a half ago and I was the one that walked away. But learning this new information changed my opinion about him – I no longer look at him as someone that I could possibly get back together with in the future, or even want to be friends with for that matter. If he was a hypothetical dress I had hanging in the back of my closet, I’ve taken it out and set it on fire. Also, this meant that I could now go into sordid detail about all the weird things he did that I’ve been keeping secret... and I did... to all my friends... and it felt great.
I saw the signs the whole time; I just chose to ignore them. If we’re going to go into details about the signs, well he... (this has been removed because my mother assured me I would be sued. Personally I think a lawsuit would be great publicity for the blog, but nevertheless, she worries about me enough)... sounds like a character from a movie right?
But really this is my life, the people I know are never normal. That’s why I write this blog, I just seem to meet the most extraordinarily eccentric people and their stories need to be told... more as a warning than anything else... but still I wouldn’t trade it.
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