When I see a shoe, within the first 2 seconds I know if I want to try it on or not, whether the shoe and I have made a connection. Sometimes it’s love at first sight. My heart will skip a beat and I get a rush of endorphins, there’s nothing like holding that shoe in your hands and putting it on your foot for the first time. I think about how much fun we’re going to have together going dancing, for walks on sunny days and on dates.
My shoes are a big part of my life, and I take selecting the right ones very seriously, I will not buy a shoe that I have lukewarm feelings for and I will not buy a shoe online, because although it may look good in the pictures and the description is great, you never really know what’s going to show up at your doorstep.
That being said, I will never use an internet dating website to try to find myself a boyfriend. I don’t understand it, where’s the first look and the sly smile? The eye contact? The feeling in your stomach telling you that you need to talk to this guy? The fun? The romance? The spontaneity?
It’s more of a job interview then it is dating. There are the free sites like Plenty of Fish (which let me tell you, if the guy’s not willing to fork over $30 a month for a legitimate dating website, do you really think he’s going to be better then the losers you’ve dated before?).
E Harmony lets you pay them and they find a match for you after you fill out their questionnaire. I imagine it goes something like this –
Age: 25-30 Check
Sex: Female Check
Desperate to get married to fill the loneliness inside: yes Check
Hair Colour: Blonde Check
Enjoys outdoor activities: No, but I’ll say yes, because guys like that Check
Wants Children: Yes, but will say no if it will get more matches Check
Number of cats: 3 Check
Low standards: Yes Check
Alright, match her up with Joe, the balding 37 year-old divorcée with 2 kids who’s desperate to move on faster then his ex-wife.
I just find internet dating so impersonal and to go though profile after profile, trying to decide who you will settle for to take you and your shoes out seems… disheartening.
I get that after a while some people get tired of playing the game, but as long as you stay happy and positive, people will be attracted to you, no internet necessary. And when you’re looking for something that plays a major role in your life, do you really want to order it off the internet?
I just found the most amazing teal stilettos last week and we're going dancing tonight.
And really when you think about it men are a lot like stilettos – when you get them, they're all new and shiny and you want to show them off to everyone. Then after a while the heel starts to wear down and they get all scuffed – you could take them in to be repaired. But isn’t it just easier to cut your losses and get a new pair with a higher heel?
Friday, April 23, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
"Hope you don't hate me. I have been kinda seeing a girl. Still love you."...
All’s fair in love and war, but there are always rules that a person should follow to ensure the game is played like gentlemen.
The number one rule is that honesty is always the best policy. A cheap thrill is your backup, they know it and you know it. So if things have gotten serious with someone else, you must keep them in the loop and vice versa.
This is important for one simple reason it is the difference between having a fun flirtation that doesn’t hurt anyone and having a fun flirtation and later being accused of seducing someone else's boyfriend.
You’ve probably guessed it by now, but our beloved Cheap Thrill who has been providing us with stories had been keeping one big piece of information to himself. That would be the girl that he’s seeing – oh but don’t worry, she lives out of town, so it’s not like she’ll find out what he’s been doing… right?
The thing is you can’t be a cheap thrill if you have a girlfriend, if you act like a cheap thrill and you have a girlfriend, that doesn’t make you a cheap thrill that makes you an asshole.
I didn’t even find out about this from him, but from another source, although I woke up to a text message on my phone from him this morning saying "Hope you don't hate me. I have been kinda seeing a girl. Still love you".
Let me tell you how last week went down. He wanted to hang out Wednesday evening but I was busy so he asked what my week was like. Friday arrives and at noon he wants to know if I’m free later. I tell him he can come over to my place, well later arrives and he says he’s coming… then he stands me up. If you want to make me angry – waste my time.
Then it occurs to me that I never actually cared enough to find out anything about him. So when I start asking around I discovered the girl he forgot to mention.
So since he wants to play dirty, I can play dirty - I have no sympathy for him, because clearly i was underestimating him before.
And on the high chance Cheap Thrill that you read my beloved blog – xo, still love me?
The number one rule is that honesty is always the best policy. A cheap thrill is your backup, they know it and you know it. So if things have gotten serious with someone else, you must keep them in the loop and vice versa.
This is important for one simple reason it is the difference between having a fun flirtation that doesn’t hurt anyone and having a fun flirtation and later being accused of seducing someone else's boyfriend.
You’ve probably guessed it by now, but our beloved Cheap Thrill who has been providing us with stories had been keeping one big piece of information to himself. That would be the girl that he’s seeing – oh but don’t worry, she lives out of town, so it’s not like she’ll find out what he’s been doing… right?
The thing is you can’t be a cheap thrill if you have a girlfriend, if you act like a cheap thrill and you have a girlfriend, that doesn’t make you a cheap thrill that makes you an asshole.
I didn’t even find out about this from him, but from another source, although I woke up to a text message on my phone from him this morning saying "Hope you don't hate me. I have been kinda seeing a girl. Still love you".
Let me tell you how last week went down. He wanted to hang out Wednesday evening but I was busy so he asked what my week was like. Friday arrives and at noon he wants to know if I’m free later. I tell him he can come over to my place, well later arrives and he says he’s coming… then he stands me up. If you want to make me angry – waste my time.
Then it occurs to me that I never actually cared enough to find out anything about him. So when I start asking around I discovered the girl he forgot to mention.
So since he wants to play dirty, I can play dirty - I have no sympathy for him, because clearly i was underestimating him before.
And on the high chance Cheap Thrill that you read my beloved blog – xo, still love me?
The original cheap thrill...
As much as I’d love to let everyone know about Cheap Thrill I’m still considering a few different ways of how I want his chapter to end. I need to hold my cards close to my chest for now.
But just remember when one door gets closed a different one gets opened, and who happened to walk through that door today but Randy.
Randy is an old cheap thrill of mine from years ago, actually he is my original cheap thrill. When I was younger we worked together and he would flirt with me mercilessly. I actually stopped dating a guy so I could pursue Randy. I was only 18 and we hung out a few times - this is when I figured out what games a cheap thrill plays. Randy is a master at playing the game, he knows exactly what girls want to hear. No hurt feelings he out played me fair and square – but at the time he was playing at an advanced level and I was still a beginner.
I haven’t seen him in years, in fact I forgot he even existed, but when I saw him today it was a great coincidence that I’ve recently had an opening in the cheap thrill department.
We chatted for about 10 minutes today and we’re going to catch up properly soon. If he’s still the same Randy he was when I knew him, he’s not dating material, but he’s funny and nice and great to hang out with.
If all else fails I’ll go looking for a guy who’s in the self-help section in Chapters – I love a guy who’s looking to be saved from one thing or another.
But just remember when one door gets closed a different one gets opened, and who happened to walk through that door today but Randy.
Randy is an old cheap thrill of mine from years ago, actually he is my original cheap thrill. When I was younger we worked together and he would flirt with me mercilessly. I actually stopped dating a guy so I could pursue Randy. I was only 18 and we hung out a few times - this is when I figured out what games a cheap thrill plays. Randy is a master at playing the game, he knows exactly what girls want to hear. No hurt feelings he out played me fair and square – but at the time he was playing at an advanced level and I was still a beginner.
I haven’t seen him in years, in fact I forgot he even existed, but when I saw him today it was a great coincidence that I’ve recently had an opening in the cheap thrill department.
We chatted for about 10 minutes today and we’re going to catch up properly soon. If he’s still the same Randy he was when I knew him, he’s not dating material, but he’s funny and nice and great to hang out with.
If all else fails I’ll go looking for a guy who’s in the self-help section in Chapters – I love a guy who’s looking to be saved from one thing or another.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
This doesn't suck...
I was catching up with my friend Abby that I haven’t seen since December. Since I saw her 3 months ago a lot has changed for her - she met her current boyfriend, he’s moved in with her and they got a puppy!
I know what you’re thinking - isn’t that moving really fast for only going out for 3 months?
Well, possibly but she’s unbelievably happy and she said to me “I’m going to do this until it sucks, and then I’m going to get out just as fast as I got in.” She's a woman after my own heart.
Abby said the only reason she wasn’t going to move in with her boyfriend is because of what other people would think – then she realized she didn’t care. Why let the judgement of other people stop you from doing what’s going to make you happy (unless it’s illegal, then you should probably think twice and have bail money ready just in case).
There will always be people who are going to judge and disagree with what you think or what you’re doing, especially is its non-conformist. Don’t listen to them, it’s your life do what you want to do. Can you imagine if I listened to people about settling down into a serious relationship in my early 20s? I knew it wasn’t what I wanted and it wouldn’t make me happy. I can’t keep my nails painted the same colour for 5 days and I’m supposed to pick one guy? By dating many men, I not only keep myself very happy, but also very entertained. And I acquire wonderful stories for all of you.
So go do something that makes you happy.
I haven’t seen my Handsome Man again (trust me I’ve been looking). So I’m killing time toying with Cheap Thrill – I figure it doesn’t suck and he has the most important quality in a man – he gives me good writing material.
I know what you’re thinking - isn’t that moving really fast for only going out for 3 months?
Well, possibly but she’s unbelievably happy and she said to me “I’m going to do this until it sucks, and then I’m going to get out just as fast as I got in.” She's a woman after my own heart.
Abby said the only reason she wasn’t going to move in with her boyfriend is because of what other people would think – then she realized she didn’t care. Why let the judgement of other people stop you from doing what’s going to make you happy (unless it’s illegal, then you should probably think twice and have bail money ready just in case).
There will always be people who are going to judge and disagree with what you think or what you’re doing, especially is its non-conformist. Don’t listen to them, it’s your life do what you want to do. Can you imagine if I listened to people about settling down into a serious relationship in my early 20s? I knew it wasn’t what I wanted and it wouldn’t make me happy. I can’t keep my nails painted the same colour for 5 days and I’m supposed to pick one guy? By dating many men, I not only keep myself very happy, but also very entertained. And I acquire wonderful stories for all of you.
So go do something that makes you happy.
I haven’t seen my Handsome Man again (trust me I’ve been looking). So I’m killing time toying with Cheap Thrill – I figure it doesn’t suck and he has the most important quality in a man – he gives me good writing material.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Infidelity is the new black…
I was asked by a male friend of mine if I thought it was cheating if he never told anyone and there was no way for his girlfriend to find out. The immediate answer out of most people’s mouth would be yes, but I think this is a grey area.
My answer to him was “I don’t know”.
If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? -only if it has a communicable disease.
Athletes that play on sports teams are famous for their infidelity. It’s easy for them; they’re always in a different city staying in hotel rooms. Who is going to find out? – we should ask Kobe Bryant’s wife.
Mistresses have become the hottest commodity for men lately. Some are being reserved about it and only having one in Argentina (Mark Sanford). Others have a 3 or 4 that include a neo-Nazi (Jesse James) and then there’s Tiger who all by himself managed to make every other guy in the world look like a saint.
I ran into Jake this past December; we started chatting and managed to get on the topic of Tiger. Knowing full well that Jake has a problem with a wandering eye; I wanted his take on it.
Surprisingly he said his wife should leave him. Then he asked me what I would do if I were her. I referenced Lorena Bobbit.
I had a discussion earlier today with Valerie about cheating. She said she could never cheat on the guy she is seeing because she would feel too bad about it. Then she asked me if I could ever cheat.
I know for sure that I would never carry on an affair while I was with someone else (unless it was with the pool boy or tennis instructor).
Once you’re in the woods, and you and your conscience are the only ones to hear the tree fall, I think the correct question isn’t “is it cheating” or “could you cheat” I think it’s all a matter of what lets you sleep at night.
I think we all learned from Tiger, if you can’t sleep at night, don’t pop Ambien and hop in your car, because those trees will pop right out at you.
My answer to him was “I don’t know”.
If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? -only if it has a communicable disease.
Athletes that play on sports teams are famous for their infidelity. It’s easy for them; they’re always in a different city staying in hotel rooms. Who is going to find out? – we should ask Kobe Bryant’s wife.
Mistresses have become the hottest commodity for men lately. Some are being reserved about it and only having one in Argentina (Mark Sanford). Others have a 3 or 4 that include a neo-Nazi (Jesse James) and then there’s Tiger who all by himself managed to make every other guy in the world look like a saint.
I ran into Jake this past December; we started chatting and managed to get on the topic of Tiger. Knowing full well that Jake has a problem with a wandering eye; I wanted his take on it.
Surprisingly he said his wife should leave him. Then he asked me what I would do if I were her. I referenced Lorena Bobbit.
I had a discussion earlier today with Valerie about cheating. She said she could never cheat on the guy she is seeing because she would feel too bad about it. Then she asked me if I could ever cheat.
I know for sure that I would never carry on an affair while I was with someone else (unless it was with the pool boy or tennis instructor).
Once you’re in the woods, and you and your conscience are the only ones to hear the tree fall, I think the correct question isn’t “is it cheating” or “could you cheat” I think it’s all a matter of what lets you sleep at night.
I think we all learned from Tiger, if you can’t sleep at night, don’t pop Ambien and hop in your car, because those trees will pop right out at you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)