Ok, so here’s the deal – it takes me about 10 minutes to decide what colour I’m going to paint my nails. Nail polish lasts for a week, and sometimes after I put it on, I change my mind, take it off and start again. So, when the universe suddenly gives me a plethora of guys, it’s very hard for me to know who to choose. There are 3 main guys, and in nail polish terms – I have a “fire engine red”, “neutral beige” and a “summer fun pink”.
So far the “fire engine red” is my favourite. The way we met is actually really funny – I was out with a friend and I saw a guy who used to play on Nick’s soccer team. I haven’t seen any of those guys in over a year, but he was staring at me pretty intently. He ended up walking over to talk to me and was with a drop dead gorgeous man. He said he wanted to introduce me to his friend because we’re both Macedonian (look up Macedonia on a map, it really does exist). Turns out, not only does this gorgeous man have the same heritage as me, he also grew up 10 minutes away from where I did. We ended up talking for 3 hours that night and called me the next day. I saw him again this past weekend and his sad news for me was that he was going away for 3 weeks. I’m looking at this as a positive, because this way I can enjoy the rest of my summer, and he’ll come back right when things start to quiet down for fall.
My “summer fun pink” guy is just that. He’s a summer boy. He’s the type of guy you chill with in the summer, and it’s always really fun, but that’s all he’s going to be. I went out for lunch with him and a girlfriend of mine the other day. We started talking about dating, and usually I censor myself, but for some reason I wanted to mess with his mind a bit. Bless his heart, by the end of lunch the look on his face looked like I verbally bitch slapped him.
Now, “neutral beige” – oh god, where do I start. He’s very sweet, actually far too sweet. He is looking for a girlfriend, and I told him not to date me, I gave him fair warning but he must like pain. It started because he has a boat, and I really liked the idea of me on a boat in the summer. The boat date was fine, a little long, and at a point when we were going back to the marina I remember thinking “I bet I could swim faster”, but it was ok.
During the date I told him for some reason this summer I’ve been craving hotdogs, and purposely going places just because I know that there will be hotdogs at the event (I wish I was kidding). Anyway a few days later, he asks me if I want to go play mini-put and grab a hotdog. Obviously I said yes, so the next day he picks me up at noon to go play.
While we’re driving there he brings up some play that he’s heard is really good, and asks me if I would want to go see it. I say yes, thinking I’ll get out of it later when he brings it up again. But to my surprise he drives right to the theatre, goes in and buys tickets for 8pm that night (I actually had other plans, but at this point had no idea what to say). So we play mini-put and he thinks it’s cute to give me a lower score than what I actually put. I would put 6 and he would say “we’ll give you a 3 for that one; oh look we’re tied now”. Honestly I don’t need my ego stroked in mini-put; I’m alright with being awful. He did this at every hole and by the 10th hole I was about to hit him over the head with the club. I refrained though because I didn’t think I could hit him hard enough to knock him out.
So after that he ordered my hotdog for me, except he got me a genetically mutated one that had cheese inside of it. As I sat there trying to eat, I suddenly realized he probably wanted to hang out all day. I asked him what his plan was. He said he wanted to take me to the butterfly gardens. It’s like he was trying to piss me off. I told him I had only planned for mini-put and had other things to do and asked him to take me home. So he drops me off at 2 and tells me he’ll be back at 5:30 to pick me up for dinner and the play (oh good).
So 5:30 rolls around and he’s early to pick me up, so he had to wait 20 minutes while I got ready. We go to a tapa restaurant and decided to sit at the bar. He orders a beer and I order vodka. He kept ordering food that I said I didn’t eat, so 4 vodka martinis and an empty stomach later I was ready to go to the play (I was most definitely drunk). I made it to intermission then told him I was sick and he needed to take me home. On the way home he started talking about some double date that we should do with friends, I didn't even acknowledge the comment. I should have felt bad, but I really didn’t. When I got home I ended up hanging out with my friend all night, and we had a blast. Then the next day he texted me saying he hoped I felt better, then the day after that he asked if I wanted to go on the boat, I told him I was still sick, so he asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I didn’t answer.
I’m not sure how I have the ability to act terribly (I actually told this story to someone and they called me a nightmare) but the guys just keep coming back for more. I do feel bad about this one though, he is very sweet, and clearly just wants a girlfriend. The problem is I don’t like being the bad one in a relationship, I mean I usually am anyway, but it’s usually less obvious.
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