If I want him to stop dating other people, does that mean that I have to stop dating other people?

So I’m reading this book and it said a very simple sentence that got me thinking. The author wrote “be the person you want to be with”. Now that’s certainly not a new idea at all, and I’ve actually heard it many times before, but this time it struck a chord.

It got me thinking who have I been when I was with guys from my past?

There was the first guy that I really dated when I was 18. He was sweet, polite, and good looking and even cooked soup from scratch. We never fought because there was nothing to fight about, he was great. And I think about the person that I was at that time; to sum it up in one sentence - I used to bake cupcakes with pink frosting for him and his roommate on a regular basis. I have nothing bad to say about this guy, he was great.

Unfortunately being as naive as I was at the time, I met a guy that was bad to his core and I was sure I could tame him. So things between the sweet guy and me ended and so did my cupcake baking habit. I often joke that this bad boy ruined me, but I was really just looking for a change of pace from being the girl that baked cupcakes.

There was nothing that was good about my time with the bad boy, that’s why they’re called bad boys. He was a moron, and just like I had nothing bad to say about the sweet guy, I have nothing good to say about the bad boy. (That’s not entirely true, I was asked last year if there was anything nice I could think of to say about him... it took me 10 minutes but I finally came up with “I liked his cologne”)

So for the past couple of years I’ve been caught up in work, not looking for anything serious, but I like to have fun. And for the past couple of years, most all of the guys I’ve dated have been career oriented and fun to be around. I’d be amiss if I didn’t mention that I’m slightly crazy, but in a good way (as a friend described it I’m “crazy-woo” as opposed to “crazy-crazy”). So yes all of the guys have been a little crazy, some more so then others, but I would rather crazy than boring any day. What am I going to write about a boring guy? We sat on the couch and watched tv, nothing happened. I’d rather be able to say we played an indoor game of soccer in his friend’s apartment and by no fault of my own the soccer ball somehow went off the balcony and into a tree 9 floors down.

So when I ‘m looking for a husband maybe I’ll start baking cupcakes again, but right now I’m perfectly happy with the men I’m with. And if I’m happy, why mess with a good thing?